Hello cmonbrain: Well... I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I don't know as I have a lot to offer with regard to your concerns. (I noted you're not interested in taking medication. I'm not on any medication either.) I also struggle with intrusive thoughts. I can only write what I have written numerous times before with regard to these kinds of concerns. My experience has been that trying to ignore, block, or stuff down intrusive thoughts simply makes them keep coming back stronger.

So, in an effort to allay my intrusive thoughts, I employ a Buddhist practice called "compassionate abiding". This involves simply allowing the intrusive thought to come forward... breathing into it... perhaps even smiling to it. Sometimes I will even place my hand over my heart as a sign of lovingkindness & compassion for it. After a few breaths, I then drop the "story line" & simply continue to stay with the underlying emotion... be it fear, anxiety, grief or whatever until it fades.

Two things happen when we employ this practice. First, very gradually over time, the strength & frequency of intrusive thoughts wanes. But second, & perhaps more important, is that we learn we can stay with difficult thoughts & emotions without losing our balance... our equanimity.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!