Quote:
Originally Posted by PsychNitrous
That has to be hard. I've been giving my mom little bits of information about how I am so she doesn't worry, because I know she will. I think our conversation earlier was worse because I didn't say anything until now about not being sure I could do it. It's scary to have to tell her more now, when I've been hiding it so well.
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Yes, i would dread having to say anything even more than I do (hardly ever) because my mom doesn't love me the way she loves my oldest sister. It's just a fact. When I was in the mental ward in April, she actually changed her voice to how she'd talk to a friend or stranger, and asked me if I'd please not upset my sister! And there's been more. She got pretty angry with me when she sounded angry about my fear of the stairs, that "theyd have to put me in a cardboard box and forklift me out of the window", and more. So to forgive all the hurt and sadness i experience, it's just really hard. It was like I never really had a mother.