This sounds ridiculous, but I honestly can't tell whether I'm depressed or if my personality just sux. I have been very irritable and sensitive lately. Feel like everyone has an ulterior motive or bad intentions. Been getting in fights with family. Feeling hopeless, alone, pessimistic. Crying and crying for no discernible reason, or over very minor events/interactions. SI, urge to self-harm etc. etc. But at the same time, I don't feel lazy and unmotivated like I usually do when I'm down. I'm not tired or fatigued. I've been productive - making a lot of progress on my various deadlines. I work work work - but why? what for? why do I care if I do a good job if everything is pointless? I'm beginning to feel like the BP thing is a sham (in my case I mean), and that really I'm just moody or dramatic or immature. sour grapes.