My Support Forums - View Single Post - To people in therapy long-term (10+ years): ever taken a break? Did it actually help?

with or without you · Jul 28, 2016 at 10:39 PM

This therapist is not keen on seeing people every other week. I tried to do that about 2 years ago because of finances and she told me that would be a very bad thing for me clinically. The one before that (the one who referred me out, like I said in my original post) did not like it when I had to go every other week for about 2 months because my car needed major repairs, she said it was not in my best interests to skip. But I did what I had to do. I don't know what the "variable" is here. Maybe when I go back, I will have found that stepping away for a while is what was needed. Maybe I need CBT instead. I just don't see the point of revisiting things in the past that are unpleasant, I've unpacked them all and the memories will always make me unhappy. Maybe I need to see someone else who is willing to see me only every other week. I just won't have the answer until I return in September and see how I feel after a few sessions.

I think my first practical goal should be getting into a routine of ADL's (Activities of Daily Living). I have been going downhill with keeping my place clean, remembering to do simple tasks, putting clothes away, things like that. But the depression makes it practically impossible.

Thank you for sharing your cousin's point of view as a psychiatrist. I think that is the first provider I have heard of who understands what I've been trying to say when I've told various providers that just the fact of seeing them over and over makes me feel damaged or something. they never get it.

Unfortunately I do not have a partner and do not want one, so I have to take care of myself. Maybe that is what's keeping me going.

I will let you know what happens as the break continues and after I return to therapy. Sorry for cutting this short, but I need to go to bed. Thank you for your support.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fizzyo

Sorry I didn't make myself clearer, I have only had 2 years continuous weekly therapy (psychodynamic counselling)
This therapy really only helped me get by week by week and I stopped it. I also wanted to feel more independent.

Since then the breaks have been longer than the spells of therapy which have mainly been to address specific issues or a particularly difficult time (such as my husband being hospitalised).

It sounds as if you have answered your own question to a certain extent, your relationship with this therapist is not as therapeutic as it could be. I suppose the question is, could she (or someone else) help you as much with more occasional visits, eg. Monthly or fortnightly, do you feel you will manage better without contact for a longer time and return to therapy of some sort when you have a specific goal to work towards (a particular issue to deal with) for a more targeted type of therapy.

In uk there is something called Brief Therapy which is helpful for life events or particular problems but takes more of a problem solving approach rather than dissecting the past like "how can I deal with this recurring issue at work so my work life is less difficult to manage" or anything like that.

Some people find a CBT type approach helps deal with a specific problem.

My psychiatrist and care coordinator (before I was discharged) both said they thought I had had a lot of different talking treatments and have probably had what long term benefit I'm likely to get, so they don't even recommend I go privately to anyone except for maybe if there is a new issue that could be helped with some short term support.

I know other people who get a worker or therapist see them once every two weeks or every month for support and to help problem solve or keep an eye on them if they relapse, but not so much for in depth revisiting of past trauma on a long term basis.

I don't know if that makes any more sense, it is really just thoughts on what I have experienced and have seen other people do.

My cousin is a psychiatrist and she says, paradoxically some people after a period of therapy then do better on their own without being reminded of their issues and being "in the system" therefore labelled as ill.

It doesn't mean all is easy and they may need more input in years to come.

I would be interested, if you want to share it, to hear how you get on with your break over the summer and how it works out for you.

Once again, kudos to you for still holding down a job.
I have now had to retire on health grounds but am lucky enough to have an occupational pension and a husband who can still work so I am trying to find a meaningful role where I feel I can contribute to society within my physical and mental health limitations.

Best of luck. I'm sending all the encouraging thoughts and hugs I can, this is a difficult decision you are making and the process may not be easy, but I believe you will know what is best for you.

Ps feel free to send a PM if you feel it would help, to me or anyone else you feel could lend an ear.