That meaningless rubbish that no one needs is a top gross money market that many do need.

If the desire to explore that industry was present, then there was a reason for it. Only you know that answer & maybe now it has led you forward to this next issue of how you perceive sex, What you want from sex & how to get there. It makes sense in this growth pattern I see from previous posts.

If passion & respect is what you desire from sex then you need to demand it from your partner. Communication is key. To me, that's plain & simple. Use your voice to get what you want & not give up what you want just to satisfy your partner. Like everything, this takes time.

But the animalistic "cold" desire, is another avenue for others that view sex as Primal. Which is probably another thread.....

Anyway, it sounds like now you know what you want. So where did these ideas come from? What you were taught? Others? School? Books? Etc. because sometimes what we expect that is preconceived, might change as we grow & mature sexually.

I think it's a great start to know what you're looking for