I hate it....

Here's the thing though: a lot of my hypomanic experiences start off as bliss, but it's all an illusion that comes crashing down on me. Really though, during those times, I am oblivious, so the saying "ignorance is bliss" really applies when I think of hypomania. I still look back on some of the experiences and wish I can re-experience them, only because they felt so good at the time, and I felt like I was on cloud nine.

Really, when my insight returns though, I realize those very things I was doing while hypo/manic were not the healthiest choices. I find myself yearning for those feelings of euphoria, but it's just a reminder of how much I hate being BP and wish I can find ways to be happy AND healthy.