I guess my husband feels like you do, as he got married to me young. No other partners. I had no other romances, just casual things, but I'm much older than him. So I've done it all alone - got a degree, bought houses, lived alone for many years. So you can understand exactly how he feels, but I don't feel that way. I wanted his friendly support while I continue to find myself. I was relieved when he stopped being so clingy and needy, but unfortunately he just kept on moving - away and behind walls.

I am doing my darnedest to reconnect now. Today started off bad as he was grumpy, but then I turned it into a win by in effect showing how I have changed. I used to be an angry rager. Now I believe in always speaking calmly to everyone. Even though he was cranky, I brought h im a peace offering of a favourite fruit. He looked confused - "You don't need to make a peace offering." No, but I like peace. I smiled. And he apologized for his behaviour earlier.

Originally the separation was because he was angry at my anger patterns of the past. I healed those. It's a just a matter of if he can see that and still want me. He says he wants to be friends, desperately, so that is the thing that keeps him from being absolutely gone right now, I am thinking.

But I do still need to get a life. Otherwise it's not worth living, with or without him or anyone else.

tx