Quote:
Originally Posted by rainyday107
I'm almost positive I'm going through a mixed episode.
I am puzzled by a couple things. Wondered if anyone has insight.
I'm not suicidal. I've had thoughts and I've attempted before...but I made a pact with my boyfriend. I will never do that again. So I'm not sitting here planning my death. Can I still be mixed.
I have surfed the Internet for two days straight. In jeans and a sweatshirt in my boyfriend's bed. I've slept some but my sleep is always erratic unless I'm in a depressive episode, in which I will sleep 16 hours a day.
It's very unlike me to be so still. Two days in bed, one activity. Really? I don't even know if I'm depressed. I've had lots of tears, including yesterday at pdoc's office.
I just don't care about things right now. Then I'll have tears pouring down my face, silently. And I don't know why. It's not hormonal. I'm on my meds.
I feel elements of mania. I recognize it. But it feels deep inside. Maybe that's why I'm so still.
This is so unlike me. It feels like I'm waiting for something to happen but I don't know what it is.
I feel tears again.
Any ideas? Just go with it, ride it out, I guess. It can be tons worse.  |
I feel for you. ((HUGS)) It sounds like a mixed episode to me too. It can absolutely still be a mixed episode, even when you are not having suicidal thoughts. It sounds like you have many symptoms of depression, and the fact you do not feel like yourself at all and can see the elements of mania in this episode all point to it being mixed episode. Do you feel more of the depressive symptoms or more mania at this point in time? Sometimes with mixed episodes, I feel both the mania and depression being equally as intense. Other times, the mania may be stronger with depressive features or vice versa. How intense would you say this episode is compared to your usual episodes? I hope the pdoc has some good suggestions for you and hope you feel better soon.