i got paranoia level 75% last night. i walked through my house about 7 or 8 times with an ice pick. i kept hearing noises and think someones in my house or trying to get in. at least i am able to walk around and check it out and confirm no ones in here. it still comes up though when i hear a new noise and have to do the walk thru again. i smoke outside on my screen porch but last night i smoked 2 cigs in my bedroom because i was too scared to go outside. my screen porch has a lock and is not easily accessible but i still felt too nervous abt it. i slept with teh ice pick sticking out from my mattress just in case... it helped me feel a little safer.

im not sure if this is bc my roommate has been gone (shes gone somewhere with her fiance for 9 days) or if its bc i increased my vybriid dose. the vybriid has made me psychotic in the past at a higher dose... i finally feel like i am crawling out of this 3 wk depresssion so i am hesitant to lower it back to the original dose. also i see my NP on the 23rd and i know she wont be happy with me messing with my meds on my own. i dont tell her a lot of things so maybe i just wont mention it... im a bad junkDNA!!!