Hello Só leigheas: I think we're on more-or-less the same page here! (Pun intended!) The Skeezyks is no longer on any psych med's at all. And I don't see a therapist. In my case, there's so much I could simply never talk about, that seeing a therapist would be pointless. (Plus, I've never been able to find one I thought was worth the time & expense.)

During my last hospitalization, a few years ago now, one of the staff offhandedly asked me if I had ever wanted to write a novel. I said yes. (Haven't we all?) Then she told me about NaNoRiMo (National Novel Writing Month.) It's a website where, every November, members try to write a 50,000 word novel in a month. (Plus they do other stuff as well.) It's sort-of a marathon for writers.

As it happened, I returned home just a few days before the beginning of November that year & so decided to check it out. I signed up & wrote my 50,000 word novel. It was TERRIBLE! I just wrote about myself though & it gave me something to focus on for that month, which was most beneficial. Plus I believe the process gave me some insight into myself I would not have otherwise had. I tried it again in subsequent years & found I just could not get into it. (I'm not really a writer.) So I'm no longer a member. Occasionally I think about trying it again. But I don't know if I ever will. However, based on that experience, I can certainly see where your writing (& drawing) activities could be most beneficial.

By the way... I don't consider what you're doing to be cowardly at all! It's simply your way of coping. And if it's working for you... great!