Thanks for your post. I hate the assumption that a person has control when they are assaulted by someone. I believe it's a myth that others parrot to feel more secure, that "that will never happen to me!" (have also read this many times, and agree with it.)

Add other trauma to the mix, like childhood abuse or mental illness, and I hate the smugness of the assumption that you should just be able to shake off your past, slap on a smile, and onward to success! Dismissing someone who has been through traumatic events as selfish, attention seeking, etc just shows ignorance. While I wouldn't wish these things on anyone else, it seems the only way someone can truly understand is after it happens to them. Until then, it's just speculation, best intentions. This doesn't mean that others can't be helpful or healing or supportive, but their ability to understand is limited.