29 years and I am finally going. Why? 1st, I read "Should I stay or Go" the chapter, "is your marriage making you sick" was right on for me. This all happened after a December incident with my son deciding he didn't like a comment I made in what seemed to be an interesting conversation about writing literature. He started yelling and swearing at me, calling a selfish ***** and all sorts of horrid things that were patently untrue. He has a temper and this was the first time it was used against me at this level. Eventually, about 20 minutes of this stuff, he was right in my face, screaming and swearing. I kept was crying and begging him to calm down and discuss this and that I was his mother and so on-I was not calm....at one point, I was afraid and upset enough to try and slap his face-not characteristic for me at all. He grabbed my arm and held it while continuing to swear, and verbally abuse me-I had some small bruises and pain after.

The kicker, my husband just stayed in the kitchen letting this happen, did nothing, said nothing. It only stopped when I threatened to call his girlfriend/fiance and parents and warn them about his temper and that I would call the police if he didn't let go immediately-I don't know how long he held my wrist-as a former marine, I was more than a bit afraid at that point and dared not move or try to get away....

The second kicker, my husband seems to be empowered by this and decides later, when I am trying to help him with something....that he needed to cuss me out for "rushing" him to think.

All though our marriage he let our children disrespect me, yell at me, etc and did not intervene even when I asked and explained why he needed to not allow this behavior. None of my kids respect me and I have done so much and supported them so much-I am not perfect but they were never abused by me-instead, I loved, supported, and encouraged them.

Right now I am still in the house-separate bedroom, looking for a job so I can move out. Was moved out and working toward divorce when my job was eliminated. I had a bad relapse of my depression and am just now getting properly treated.

I consider myself separated-he never touches me, no sex, no affection, no conversation. Getting out of the house--at least I think, is a priority to really beating this depression-just don't know when or how yet.

Thanks for listening......