my T has a gift. Just when i start feeling like we have made some progress in me trusting him... he goes away. One of the reasons i personally think he is such a good T, meaning he seems laid back, relaxed and generally happy, is that he does take time for himself regularly. i honestly think that is good. He gets refreshed, doesn't get too bogged down and has so much more to give when he is there.

but

it also means that i have to cope in between. since switching to 2xweek i have found it harder. It feels like he is gone longer.

this absence just happens to coincide with another... not preplanned. It means i see him once next week. So in three weeks i see him once. i'm not sure i should keep that appt.

i don't know if seeing him will give me a boost or break that fragile self-help bubble i have. i have been trying not to think about missing him. we can hardly do anything difficult during that session...

very lonely. very sad.

the docs can't agree on what's wrong with me. fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, hormones... blah blah blah. i just feel like crap a lot. i walk around with this overwhelming desire to just sleep for a bit. i never ever used to be able to take a nap... now i can sleep anywhere at anytime. i am always tired.

depressed and tired and sad and lonely