Hello ziiz: I'm sorry you are experiencing this difficulty. I'm an old man now. But I can still remember how it was when I was young. Unfortunately I don't know as I have any particularly insightful suggestions for you. Honestly, I don't know what can be done with regard to the sexual urges you experience. They're a part of being a young man.

Perhaps the thing you could work on is how you feel about yourself, the terror you feel when talking to people in public, & the response you're getting from women you meet, as well as with regard to your family history. These are things you could work on with the help of a skilled therapist. It can take a while to find the right one for you. But if you can find one you feel is right for you, that person might be of great benefit. Perhaps it's worth a try. I wish you well...