Hello menthapulegium: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

With regard to your post, I would simply say that from my perspective, in the whole scheme of things, this all simply is not something to get all worked over. It was an unfortunate way to have this relationship begin. But these were simply boyfriend / girlfriend relationships. It's not like you were formally engaged... or even married. I would have to say, if this young woman leaves you as a result of this, it's probably for the best before things go any further.

Long term relationships are tough to maintain. So if your lady decides to bail over this, perhaps there was simply not that strong a commitment to begin with. I know these sorts of situations can seem like a big deal to young people. And I am an old person. So I suppose I have a different perspective. To me, if the two of you were to try to make a life together, this is simply not the biggest hurdle the two of you will face in your lives. What's important is that you be honest, open & true to one another from here on.

I think all you can do at this juncture is to wait & see what happens. Certainly, when the opportunity arises, it seems to me it would be appropriate to send along a friendly message. You don't want her to think you're no longer interested, or that you've given up & moved on. But don't hover either. And if, at some point, she says it's over & she asks you to stop contacting her then, sad to say, you're done.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!