I'm sorry if this is inappropriate (or perhaps already discussed) but is it possible that your obsession with your T is deflecting from you making a decision about your real life relationship?

I know that for a while my Transference allowed me to escape a very unhappy relationship and imagine 'running away' with some one who seemed to fit the kindness and understanding I was hungry for. I finally made a decisions to leave my unhappy situation and although my Transference is still present, it's not nearly as powerful or desperate feeling and I can feel myself coming back to Me.

You have a right to be happy. What would happen if you focused on your real-life relationship instead of your T? Can you change something there that would better fit YOUR needs?