Well, two things came to my mind reading this. One, she does want you to be independent rather than fostering dependence as some argued in one of your earlier threads.

Second, the being 'angry'. I think every T and client relationship is different, unique, and as such does not - should not - follow a cookie-cutter format. I think it takes a certain level of...comfort, familiarity or closeness to be able to say: 'I am angry'. That's how I took your T's message anyway. She felt she had to draw the line & felt you could hear it, if it makes sense.

Maybe try it as homework. When anything happens in life, don't react immediately but let the feelings work themselves out, or write everything it stirs. Usually, you may feel the intensity diminishes or you view it from a different angle. It can also prevent one from hurting other people's feelings when reacting in such a knee-jerk fashion.

Yet, credit to you here again, for seeing & owning your part. I know 'little' (young) rainbow wants to hold on to T but a more mature rainbow reflects understanding of: 'I want that real bad but yah, I know I can't have it'. And even better, verbalising it.

I think it is a sign of progress! Don't you feel so?