Those are very realistic wants Aviza. If a partner does not treat you with respect and love it is not the right relationship. You deserve someone who loves you for who you are. We have all failed at some time, I'm glad you are going to keep trying.

I also struggle with pleasing my mother, I've had to take a step back and tell myself that this is my life to live and even though she may mean well she does not control me.

I can't comment on online dating, I've never tried it. I prefer to meet people in person..... not that I really like to meet people I'm really socially awkward.