I did thank my daughter for handling the aftermath of everything in a much more mature way than I did. She apologized for her part in not answering me/acknowledging my questions, and for seeming ungrateful about the special snack I was offering. She came home and made her brother a special snack to make him feel better about missing out. She accepted my apologies about my outburst, and offered to bring me some water while I was lying down. She's amazing.

She knows that I struggle with getting overwhelmed, and I think I'm pretty good about talking with her when I lose it - apologizing when it's warranted, reassuring her that controlling my emotions is something that's my responsibility and that I'm working on it constantly, letting her know that my reactions to her behavior sometimes are not in proportion to whatever it is that she might have done.

My son is young enough that I apologized, and as soon as he had snack, he was good. I do try to talk with him about feeling overwhelmed and needing to take breaks, and that I have a hard time controlling big emotions sometimes (just like he does). I don't think he gets it yet, at least not on the level that she does.