Quote:
Originally Posted by Brown Owl
My first T, who I saw for 10 months used to challenge me like your T is doing. I found it really difficult, and experienced shame and rejection. My view on it now is that she was challenging the wrong thing. What I need to have challenged is the shame I feel about being me, and my view that my feelings are unimportant etc. ...
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Brown Owl, thanks for this. I think you're on to something there...
In this particular situation I kept thinking "I need something else" - even though I couldn't really pinpoint *what* it is/was that I needed.
But maybe it really is a question of choosing a different path: Of self-compassion and positive self-affirmation instead of being challenged. Even though "challenging" sounds far too strong for what she said/did in the situation. She wasn't harsh, or strict, or anything near judgmental in her tone/attitude. The feelings of shame and being judged are all my "mind-games". Which makes it even more difficult for me to be self-compassionate about all this. Because the trigger is so "non-existent" if you look at it from an outsider's perspective...
So I guess you are right, what's needed might be more support from her side so I'm able to find a more self-affirming attitude in all this.