Oh Rainbow, I do feel for you, I really do, and I can't imagine what you are going through. Can you try not to question it and just let it be. Your T is what she is and your relationship is there, as it is. The more you question what she meant by that statement or whether you have a secure attachment or not just gets you feeling worse. It doesn't change the situation. Your T is not ousbinbg you out of the door, I am sure of it. She may be just letting you know you have options, but whatever, it doesn't really change anything for now at least.

I only say this because when my T and I were discussing the child v adult v good enough mother we went round and round in circles until I decided that whatever we both thought or felt on that it didn't change what we did have and how we were working, it was all fairly immaterial. As soon as I realised that I found I could let it go and just revel in the relationship as it was.

I hope that helps in some way. Hugs to you.