Awww.. I'm sorry ThisWayOut. I've been in that situation, and the feeling of regret that comes after is pretty awful!

Do you think you'd do it differently, if the same thing happened again? I guess that's how I try to get some value (and feel less awful) - by figuring out what I wish I had done, and sort of mentally rehearsing it, so that next time the opportunity comes up, I can do better.

And, do you think you might talk with her about it on Monday? I wonder if she can help you clarify a bit what you were hoping for (when you say that part of the reason was not knowing what you wanted)?

*hugs*.

And, yup, I'm sure that I get in my own way all the time. Sometimes not in the same way that you describe. I freaked out about ex-T, went back... mostly to just confirm that I *could* go back, and now am thinking... I left for a reason, he's not a good match for me, what the heck did I do? I kind of wish I could have just left him in the past. *sigh*. Life is hard, therapy's hard, it's all hard - ya know? I think we've got to just do the best we can, and deal with the consequences!