I think this is one of those things where you might just have to find out what works for you... I'm sorry, that's not very helpful, is it? But for me, it works because if somebody tells me a secret, it makes me feel honoured and proud of being thought worthy of knowing whatever it is, and to be honest it wouldn't occur to me to talk about it with anybody else - that would only cause feelings of shame and unhappiness. It also ties into the fact that I'm very reluctant to tell other people about my own secrets - I'm only safe as long as I'm as quiet as possible, that's a very deep-seated truth for me.

So that's what I mean by it being individual. I simply don't enjoy gossip so for me it's easy not to do it - that's not because I am a better person, it's no different from how I don't like swimming so I don't do it, and that doesn't make me a worse person. I might be a little jealous of people who enjoy swimming, but I don't think they are more morally upstanding for having a different set of hormones.