Hello xGoldenrose: I don't know as there is much of anything I can say with regard to your concerns. I do believe you are correct that your family & friends are not the people to share this with... which is why, from my perspective, ruling out the possibility of seeing a mental health professional may be an unfortunate decision. It may well not be necessary to consider something like this now. However, as time goes on, if the experiences you're having continue, I hope you will reconsider the idea of seeking professional help.

I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!