Shortly past 4:30 and my mom's already sloppy drunk. It makes me mad, because I don't even get to drink tonight, and all because of her. First she forgot to tell dad to pick up a half pint for me. Then she said she would share hers with me, but obviously she drank it all on her own. Now she's on a cleaning binge. The bathroom's all torn up and I'm expected to have everything off my floor so she can sweep. My bet is that she doesn't even finish it all. The rugs will all stay on the living room floor overnight and the bathroom will remain a mess. I cannot even shower today because of it.

I would help her, honestly I would, but I don't want to be around her when she's in that state. It really effin' depresses me.

This is what separates me, an occasional drinker, from their alcoholic mess. And yet they feel the need to put the reigns on my drinking. When the entire reason I drink is to cope with their drinking and the emotional toll it takes on me each. and. every. day.