Thanks, Ruh (and I do like your dog face!) I wrote in the middle that I trust him to handle this right, but actually on reflection, I don't think that is true. I don't trust him or any of them...

He and I get on really well and have a relaxed, 'friendly' T relationship (not as in, we are friends. Just mutually respectful and, I think, we like each other as people). But I know zero about him. And there lies the quandary: I can't know anything about him if the therapy is to work.

But it's asking an awful lot for me to trust he can steer us through something like this, I can be vulnerable and he would not take advantage of me. I totally feel like damaged goods: like I don't deserve or am unable to have the usual safeguards and boundaries that protect people in these situations.

And there's something about me that gives people permission to abandon them & throw the usual rules to the wind...

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