Anna I agree with Una and trippin. I think you maybe reading a bit much into what is more of a personal experience in a dysfunctional crappy family dynamic. I'm sorry that you went thru this..like Trippin said no child should feel they are not being treated as well as other children in household/ family..... But I can tell you for a fact that being the "scapegoat or good child/bad child" treatment is certainly not exclusive or as far as I can tell more prevelant at all in re: to being the child of a single parent or 2parent household....(maybe in ur family there was some animosity between ur mum and aunt that caused this)....but in general I would say this kind of ****** parenting "playing favorites" is seen way more often in 2 parent households between siblings. I know it doesn't make it any better for you..I am also the "bad one" in my family, they still treat me l I e dogshitte to this day...I never did anything to deserve this..I have talked to my T a lot about why this is/ was and have come to terms with it as much as possible...basically I have the absolute minimal contact w/my family as humanly possible..bc, they aren't going to change their minds or ever treat me any better, and dealing w/ them just causes me more pain. ....none of us should ever have to feel like this...so sorry u went thru it too.
The one upside is that it made me a much better mother. I was young and single when I had my first and married to my second's father...and honestly, I have never found that my hubbies or in laws treat my 1st any different than the 2nd who is their blood....if anything, the only differential treatment they receive is in my family who....obv. sux to begin with....but unlike their treatment towards me, I don't see this as malicious or purposeful. And it's the 1st child they give more too...not the 2nd! So right there is the opposite of what u experienced....if anybody has been punished for being a single parent its me NOT MY KIDS!
All this being said, Anna...I want u to know that I am in no way belittling what you went thru as a child....just pointing out that... a lot of us had awful families and childhoods...coming from all different backgrounds and for infinite reasons...which please know IS NEVER THE CHILD'S FAULT NO MATTER WHAT THEY TOLD YOU