Thank you for the welcome, Rainyday. I've been away for a while, but I''m around from time to time. You wrote: "I'm not in your situation and I not minimizing things" That was a nice thing to say.

and " - but how about ignoring those nibblers that can wait if you think about it. " I did that this morning, and that's how I was able to calm down enough to get to the party my b/f and went to in the afternoon. It's just that the clutter and demands of my small apt. rattle me. They scream at me, in a way. It was like when I used to garden. I had beautiful yards in 3 homes (sequentially) Large flowering shrubs, beautiful perennials, and a veg garden. All I would see were the dead-head flowers to pick off, the weeds to pull....it was always something that detracted from the fruits of my gardening labor, and I loved doing it, but I really wanted to just bask in it and I never could. You know what -- whenever I move to a new place, I do into my new apt or home and there is NOTHING IN THERE. I love it! The walls are bare, there is room everywhere. I swear I will never, ever put anything on the walls. But I always do, and I really do so much enjoy what's on my walls. Not the least of which is original art work - some of my own, some of my boyfriends, some of my late best friend, and other things my artistic friends give me and a few I've bought.