Not alcohol but pot for me. I smoked pot every night I was depressed for years to numb the pain. It wasn't until a few months ago when I stopped smoking it when depressed that I realized I had been medicating all those years. The depression suddenly came back just like it did when I was in high school before I started smoking. Suddenly I realized I am still exactly the same. With some research and help from a friend I self diagnosed then confirmed it with a psychologist. I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who did this kind of thing.