Trying to decide to get to an AA meeting. It's hard to get there when other parts want to drink.

Been very depressed lately....life seems so futile. Its like I have barriers in my mind, barriers in society, barriers at work, barriers at home, and barriers in my body.

It just gets so tiredsome fighting all of it all the time. What hope I did have got put out like a candle in the breeze. Waiting for a moment of instant inspiration to fuel our next drive, any second, minute, or day now.