Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006
My first impulse related to the silence from him is that take everything into account here - he broke up with you on good terms and for good reason. He is the one that sent frantic texts, as you described sounding like he is kind of regretting his decision. Likely after the last interaction he may be thinking just what you are, confused, unsure of how to proceed etc. Maybe his reaction to such confusion is immobilizing. it is in his court, that is, the ball, but the thing is he did contact you early on. I don't think it's anything to worry about per se.
Going forward, if you mutually agree - yes you should have this conversation - maybe you should take it as it comes and breaking off completely wasn't what either of you really want but need to have space in the relationship itself and go slower? That is completely a possibility. You dont' have to go all in to be together and it doesn't have to be black and white "together or apart". It can be something you're both more careful of taking into account his needs for some space and time. and being a father.
hang in there. be patient for now, I say. Then when the opportunity to speak again, have the "talk" I'm alluding to here  hope this helps. |
First of all, thank you everyone for your responses. They help, and I'm glad for the support.
In response to this particular post....I agree, and this is what I am thinking, that it doesn't have to be 'together and apart.' After a little over two weeks of me not initiating contact and giving myself space, he called me and asked me out. After having time to put things into perspective (it's been a month since we've been broken up), I decided for myself there are different things going on in his life that make it where I don't want a serious relationship with him since he isn't even legally divorced yet and lacks stability emotionally and other wise (yes, I know it probably wasn't best to get involved in a newly separated person in the first place, although we do have a connection). Moving forward, I decided not to get involved with someone separated again since people often think they are ready, but they aren't.
I will go out with him to see how it goes, but I refuse to put my life on hold. I do have feelings for him, and he expressed he has feelings for me. I'm interested to see what he has to say over dinner. That being said, I plan to keep it brief when I go out with him and not dive into anything, especially since I'm not ready for that now. I even went on a couple of dates with others during our time apart just to enjoy the company of someone new without committing to anyone right now. I'm feeling happier overall. I look back and think there was too much pressure before we broke up, and it put a strain on our relationship. It seems we still want to be a part of each other's lives and need to just take a step back for now.