Just to clarify, was trying to say I don't buy the basic idea that relational issues can or should be worked on in therapy, via this concept of transference. I don't see sufficient evidence nor compelling argument.

Seems therapy provokes strong responses in some people, and this is taken as evidence of some issue that must be subjected to continued therapy. But seems it could be evidence that... therapy provokes strong responses in some people. Might become a self-fulfilling prophecy. I get that real life stuff bleeds over into therapy, but how much, and what of it?

This is a bit of a tangent, but it's the main thing that occurs to me when I read OP's initial post.