thank you so much guys. yes I for sure now know that the problem is within me I have to work on it asap. I really appreciate your help and help me see the actually problem. I did not know untill now that i had this problem with me because i have never have been in a long term relationship before even though i had couple of them which were a disaster. the first one did not really work because she liked someone else and the second one she cheated on me i think part of the problem was the second relationship i had also. now i know that Im the bad one and i need to work on my problem first before i loose her completely.

thank you so much for enlighting me