Thank you for sharing. I can relate to your struggle. I recently canceled a surgery the day before it was supposed to happen because I suddenly didn't trust the doctor. He was a him and he was tall and aloof, just like the man who abused me. I tried to explain to him when I called to cancel that I was having a PTSD trigger and needed time to deal with it. He wasn't sympathetic at all, even when I explained my abuse history. He just kept saying it was just a little surgery.

So I'm never going back to him and I choose not to feel guilty about it. I guess he made that easy enough for me.

Hope this story helps. My hope for you is that you always find a way to entrust yourself only to doctors you feel you can trust. I know life doesn't always make that easy, but it will still be my hope for you.

Take good care.

isurvived