I'm so sorry about what you are going through. I know how hard it can be to get attached to the wrong person, and I'm struggling with that now. I also have a pattern of choosing emotionally unavailable people....or just thinking I can "make" someone fall harder for me over time, when really I set myself up for disappointment. I ask myself why I'm so hung up on my most recent ex and even my ex before him. A lot of people would run the other way since they have a lot of issues that most wouldn't be willing to take on in a relationship. It's difficult once I'm emotionally invested in the person, but I try to remind myself it is not too late to work on detaching and keeping in mind that these signs all point to the fact that it just isn't the right partner. In your case, it sounds like your goals are different from his, which poses challenges, and it's hard parting ways for you especially since you invested a lot into the relationship.

Time really does heal in situations like this. You'll gain clarity over time, and remember to take care of your own needs. Neglecting them is dangerous territory, especially for those of us with Bipolar Disorder. You aren't expected to have all the answers yet, but take it one day at a time. Hope this helps even if it's just a little bit. I can relate to a lot of this, and it's definitely not easy.
((HUGS))