I can totally relate, I was a divorced stay at home mom for many years before I became a self employed painter. I had a lot of various advice on how to deal with that question. The most poignant moment for me was when I told the people at common sense media I was disabled and they rejected me for a survey. I could not bring myself to say I was a stay at home mom because I was so ashamed of being divorced with a mental health disability. I hear what you are saying about not wanting to date until you are employed. I do not know if you qualify for any anonymous programs. I have also heard that meet up is good. I also don't know if you belong to a church or not but that is another good place to meet people.