I'm at home working on a Saturday night. The hubs is out... I'm not confident enough to leave the house to see friends that I haven't seen in awhile after gaining weight from the meds. I'm officially moping. I know I'll feel guilty for not going, too. It's a special event for a not-terribly-close friend. I feel like I should be going, but I can't will myself to get ready (cover my lithium-caused breakout with make-up and lithium-caused weight gain with carefully selected clothes), drive over, be social, and have enough self-control to not drink because with the meds I'm on I can't drive after even 1. It's just too much.

So here I am. Working and watching netflix by myself while I have this pit of SAD in the middle of my chest.