You are making a problem that is your daughter's boyfriend's problem, your problem.

It is not even clear to me that your daughter has a problem. She 'blows money'? What does that mean? She is in college. That's not the stage in your life where you save up money. And even if she has a money problem, if it is her money and if it doesn't get out of hand, what you can actually do is limited.

Now, if you are paying for all her expenses, you might have a say. But her 'wasting money', that's just your judgment. Maybe it is an investment. Maybe she is getting important life experiences partying, traveling, or whatever she is doing with her money.

As for her BF, why withhold approval? It's not how you influence who she picks to out to start a relationship. Parent's have a huge effect on how their children pick their spouses, but they don't do any of that by approving or disapproving. You did that by learning her what good partner qualities are from the nature of the relationship you and your husband have.

Don't know where the the daughter using drugs and being almost pregnant come from. But maybe thatś just culture difference.

As for the argument that she cannot possibly even drink alcohol, my parents are both alcoholics. One a functional one, the other a totally dysfunctional one. As a teenager, I used to be the only one not drinking, and I was able to do this because I was too autistic to be affected by this thing called peer pressure. Now that I am older, I have 'secretly' drunk alcohol, just to mellow stress away and 'help relax', even though I despite alcohol.

I'd say it goes the other way. If a parent is alcoholic, the child is more likely to be. Both because of genetic reasons as for nuture reasons.