Quote:
Originally Posted by jpb4815
The thing that makes it hard to define as abuse is that when I call her on it she twists it all around until I believe it's all my fault. I feel like such a pathetic fool sometimes. In other aspects of my life I am very clear with my boundaries and what I expect from people. When it comes to her I am lost.
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Abusers can be very adept at twisting things around like that. It is part of the abuse, as it keeps people off-balance and doubting themselves. You doubt yourself in recognizing it as/calling it abuse. For an abuser, this is mission accomplished. Accountability averted. If you can recognize this dynamic, maybe you won't have such a hard time calling abuse abuse.
It isn't easy, I know. Twisting makes my head spin too.