Which was: Love. Period.

Here is my pure unadulterated, uncensored, 'not search for the right words to make sure no one is going to be offended' answer:

The problem is that the word 'love' is about as charged a word, and open to interpretation word as 'God'. Nearly everyone has a different opinion about what love is and they know that their definition is the only one true way. So let me give you my thoughts on love - not to talk you into accepting my way of thinking, but so that you'll know where I'm coming from. Every poet and philosopher since time began has been trying to give a definition of love, so don't count on me to pull it off but here's some general thoughts...

I suggested in my thread that, "On the list of “What I want” you find that 'my partners joy' is at, or close to, the top of the list. When one's partner's joy is paramount to each of the people in a relationship, you are emotionally compatible. Her joy and happiness is literally my joy and happiness.

Imagine that you come home to the man you love and finding him sobbing uncontrollably on the couch. You drop your bags and run over to him asking what's wrong but he's literally choking on his tears and can't catch his breath long enough to speak. What is your priority right now? What would you give up to make his pain go away? Are you thinking about you in that moment - or is it all about him?

I think most people in a relationship are just thinking about their partner in that moment and would do almost anything to relieve their pain - and they call that love. Maybe they're right.

But consider this: I just watched the movie Southpaw with my wife tonight. A little girl who had just lost her mother to a stray bullet was screaming at her father, "I hate you! It should have been you that died!" If you're the dad right now, what is your priority? What would you give to make your daughter's pain go away? Do you want revenge for what she said to you? Do you want to make her feel as bad as she just made you feel? Probably not.

I think a good parent is just thinking about their child in that moment and would do almost anything to relieve their pain. That's love. And few people bring it to the table in an adult relationship. If we did, we might be willing to step out of ourselves long enough to realize that our partner not meeting our needs has nothing to do with us. All we'd see is someone we love hurting and want to help.

I knew the moment I laid eyes on her...but waited four hours to tell her that I was going to spend the rest of my life with her cause I didn't want to scare her off.

Anyway, I am exhausted and was on my way to sleep when I saw this. I wanted to try and answer before bed but now I'm concerned that I may not have been up to the task. I hope it made some kind of sense.