The borderlinee diagnosis was the shock to me. I wasn't surprised by the ADHD and I have sort of made piece with being bipolar already. Back when I lived in the states people around me used to use the term 'borderline' to describe people they thought were out of control and had serious mental issues....including my mom who's a psychologist. I think always being around people who used it in such a horribly negative way really bothers me now that I've been diagnosed with it.

I definitly think the lack of acceptance from my mom and best friend feels like an actual acceptance of me. Almost like I have some plague and they don't want to talk about or be around. Or something that they want to wish away or explain away. It's very invalidating. I feel like they've made themselves the victim of my illness and are ignoring the fact that in the one who has to endure and live with it everyday.