I am on my second day of back up to 40 mg. Felt much worse yesterday. Hoping for more stability this week. More creativity is what I am looking for. Seeing my pdoc next week and will make a taper plan then. I need more help with meds too as this depression is relentless and worsening.

As for self medicating I stopped pot a few months ago and eased up on the alcohol but last night I snapped and thought **** it! So I drank quite a bit. Now I regret it as I know it doesn't help the moods.

I have been very unwell now for three months, and really 9 months with a few breaks. I am fed up with it and hope I get better soon too. Thanks.