Quote:
Originally Posted by seesaw
Wow. I definitely don't think someone has the right to know about my PTSD or Depression on the first date or even on the fifth date. It's my personal business. I feel like you tell the person when you are comfortable with them knowing and feel like you can trust them. There is a lot of stigma associated with mental health disorders, and you absolutely have the right to be assessed by you and your character and personality and not some perception of an MI.
I think you did the right thing in waiting until you felt it was time to.
Seesaw
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I agree with this 100%. It's really up to the person to disclose mental health history at their own discretion, when they feel the time is right.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crazy Hitch
That's EXACTLY it see. I had to trust him truly before discussing this. And it wasn't an easy conversation.
I get the point of what others are saying, but if he truly accepts me, doesn't that mean he accepts me, warts and all.
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I think so, Hitch. It's not easy telling someone you've grown to love deeply that you've been struggling with MI. I don't even like to talk about it with my own family because it feels uncomfortable, awkward as hell, and I also don't want to worry them or make them feel sad because I sometimes think dark thoughts. I've grown to think that if someone truly loves you and it's meant to be, then they'll accept you, all of you, even the demons and emotional baggage you carry with you. After all, it's not necessarily their responsibility to help you carry that emotional baggage and to help fight those demons, but I imagine having someone actually want to do that because they love and care about you that much would help ease the burden and make the fight that much easier. Or maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic who's also hopelessly naïve.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crazy Hitch
And stigma - I forgot to comment on stigma.
If I run around telling people I'm bipolar they're gonna assume I'm *crazy*  |
That is also true. I don't openly broadcast on dating sites that I struggle with MI because that would make about 90% of potential partners just run in the opposite direction, without taking the time to get to know me first, and realizing that I'm not just that "crazy" woman, but I also have depth to my personality. I have hopes, dreams, feelings, and am infinitely more complex than any mere label could hope to capture. After all, we aren't defined by the illness we fight to overcome, but rather how we chose to go about fighting the good fight against said illness. At least, that's how I think of it as. It just takes a good person to realize this, and not the other way around. Hitch, I hope your BF is that good person. I really do.
