I am reading and am shocked that you have no more access to info than you have reported. I totally believe you; yet, am so sorry. It's hard to believe we can lose a loved one into a system like this and can be left wondering what's happening!
If she's been ordered to take medication, then they know she's ill. It seems like their knowledge that she is ill would somehow free someone up to say something to family being treated as "outsiders."
My heart goes out to all of you.
I hope you will be given pertinent info. soon.

WC