I am so scared I am going to forget again. We have been having a breakthrough of sorts which ex t has been helping with, but now I am in another city and have to give all my attention to real world things for a few weeks. I can feel the internal stuff slipping away as I dive into the real world work and I am so afraid of losing it completely.
It has slipped away, repeatedly, many times before. Each time years go by. It is years and years before I 'wake up' and realize what is going on, what needs to be done. I don't want to wake up again and be years older and still in the same situation.
I feel stuck in limbo, trying to hold on to both worlds and failing at both.