Quote:
Originally Posted by Trace14
Oooooo EMDR. Not sure if you saw some of my posts about how I wasn't prepared for EMDR and when we did it it "hooked" some past traumas I wasn't ready to address. Causing me to go into a downward spiral. It was my first experience with EMDR and a T. So I thought that what ever they did was in my best interest. But when I actually started seeing another T she said that I had not been prepared for the EMDR, hadn't discussed a safe space, and that it was something that needed to be done consistently not every now and then. Had terrible nightmares afterwards about things that happened so long ago that I thought I had dealt with.....but I guess not. So I hope your T has prepped you for this, it's wonderful you can contact her. Most say that's a boundary issue. But get me started on the morals, or lack of, of T's.
If you feel like self harm just talk to us, if you would like.
Yes, those grounding procedures are kind of hard to remember when you feel like you are knee deep in alligators, or not even connected to this world.
But try to use them and avoid the urge to SH. We are here for you.
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Wow, sounds like that first t just kinda threw you into the deep end without teaching you to swim...
T and I have gone over a bunch of prep work for emdr, but it never seems to feel adequate once we actually start. It has me doubting my ability to tackle my trauma issues outside of an inpatient/residential program, or at least without iop support. I'm not sure why I seem unable to tolerate it as well as other people might (coz clearly they can manage outpatient trauma work when I still can't)...
This t is only one of maybe 3 t's I've seen over the years (out of about 18) who encourages outside contact. It's only ever been the trauma t's that have allowed me to call or text as needed, though most have only had a crisis line option... this t has seen me crash hard in the past. She had wanted me to reach out more at the time, but I was not able to get past my anxiety around it. Now it's part of the plan to keep me from having to go inpatient on an emergency basis... I'm kinda waiting for her to draw a line and say "no more" because I'm bugging her so much lately. :/ she says she won't, but I still worry...