Yes, I agree, and I am fully aware of the possibility I might have to break up with her. However ATM, I am more interested in rectifying the situation.
My gut says I should probably try and re-establish the limits of the relationship, and if she continues to break them, then there is nothing left for me in it. She can tell when I'm insecure about the relationship, but instead of trying to reassure me (which is what I would do) she adds fuel to the fire. It's possible if I don't show my insecurity, she would act opposite.

I wonder is it normal for me to have to continuously be "a player" and on the lookout for those s**t-tests? I kind of always figured they were important while you are dating, not when you are in a serious relationship.

I will try and demonstrate a couple of situations.
-We go out seperately, but accidentaly end up in the same place, and she is sitting literally just behind my back, turning her back to me (she is with her friends), while I'm talking with mine, on 2 occaisons, I turn around and try and talk with her, we really just exchange a few words and turn back. The whole time we were there she doesn't really say anything to me. Like an hour later (or more) I go to the bathroom, and return to see her and one of my best friends (in who she has no any interest in i'm sure) are talking (or he is talking mostly), and she is turned around. I overhear the topic is anime, which she hates (at one point before I mentioned that I watched couple of good ones and she didn't even want to talk about it). Later when I ask her how is it possible we sit literally next to one another and don't direct even couple of sentences to one another, she has some ******** excuse like "I didn't want you to get jealous at me talking with (whatever some guys were there and a girl)". (We actually had a scene longe time ago).

-We have a kind of have a fight and go to sleep, tomorrow morning I wake up angry as I fell asleep. She literally evades me half of the day and cleans half of the apartment.( later she said she knew I was angry and didn't want a confrontation)
Asks me if we are going anywhere, and I say "I don't know". I can't go to the beach (which was the plan yesterday) with her, and her friend angry as ****, I mean thats obvious. So we talked a bit and I asked her if she thinks this is OK, the situation we are in and she just says "Yes" "I'm fine".
She just puts on some clothes, and beach stuff and storms out. I am left alone in my apartment angry as **** still, and not getting any better cause I have no closure. She even asks me later if I want to come to the beach (she was in city where I study for the first time ever), I am still angry so I can't go or there will possibly be a scene in front of her friend and for that matter, I don't want to act like everything is OK. She comes back and we have a fight of course cause she doesn't want to talk about it, and is just sitting with hand over her face, head turned away, stuff like that. Even acuses me of bringing it up again, cause she almost forgot it.

I thought I could just pack her stuff, put it in the hall and tell her she can go and sleep with her friend, and go home tomorrow. I didn't.
I don't know how to deal with her when she acts so selfishly (the night before, she told me it's my fault she didn't have fun while we were out, forgot the part where when we were supposed to dance and have fun, she excused herself and went to talk to other friend leaving me and the friend we were supposed to go to the beach with alone, then when we confronted, she said she didn't say it was my fault she didn't have fun, she said she just imagined the night differently and it's my fault I am projecting it onto myself)

Sorry for bothering you all with all these stories, I just needed to vent a bit, didn't imagine I'd write so much but it just keeps comming!!