When my great-niece was 17 and just out of high school my nephew (her adoptive father) threw her out of the house because he was seeing a new woman and didn't know how to/want to handle a teenager. (My great-niece's mother had died from a drug OD a few years before my great-niece graduated from high school.)

My great-niece, who I'll call "M" was accepted to a university on an art scholarship. She was an intelligent, bright, talented young woman. At that time she excelled academically. Unfortunately, she was also mentally ill with more and more delusions, and very self-destructive. Her mother had been emotionally and physically abusive and her father, my nephew, was very harsh with M. He seemed to believe that a good parent is one who lays down THE LAW. In addition to his ineffective fathering, my nephew is a heavy drinker - probably an alcoholic, for many, many years.

M started college, but couldn't keep going because of her mental illness and increasingly present delusions. She dropped out, stopped living in the dorm, and became homeless. She remained homeless for 3 years. She got into drug use (meth) and was arrested a couple of times. She was hanging out with dangerous people who were unhealthy for her.

M's delusions took the form of things such as the belief that due to the Cold War there was 'bad' activity going on under the streets of certain cities, and it was M's responsibility (she believed) to 'save everyone'. M, despite her harsh circumstances, remained a caring, VERY sensitive, loving person - even to people who did not deserve her depth of care and love.

M was living on the streets of a number of cities. I had lost touch with her, and frankly didn't want her around me while she was doing drugs and hanging out with dangerous people.

Suddenly, this week I heard from someone who knows M that But my sister chose not to tell me about my great-niece, even though my sister knows I was close to M. The reason my sister did not tell me is because she is in denial about her son's (my nephew's) alcoholism, womanizing, and emotional abuse. My sister is in denial about a lot of things, for example, that she was an emotionally abusive parent and neglectful at times, of her 4 children.

My nephew is currently in a custody battle for his youngest child, a little boy. I love my nephew, but I do not think he should be parenting more children without intervention for his drinking and the other problems he has. My sister has spent my nephew's life trying to protect him from everything and everyone. She never taught him healthy boundaries or how to cope well in life. He is now 46 years old. My sister didn't tell me about M because my sister is afraid my nephew will lose custody of his young son. She is afraid that I will speak out against him to his son's mother's lawyer, and tell the lawyer that I believe he is an unfit father.

I'm posting this because I need to get it out. I am exhausted from the shock of the news about my great-niece. I am exhausted from the horror of what has happened, and I am furious with my sister because she denies so much and chooses to remain a mentally unstable person who would never get help in her life (she is 71 years old, 18 years older than I am).

I guess I'm in shock, and very frustrated with my sister.

Thanks for reading my post.