May I contribute?

I have compassion for someone with very strong ASPD/sociopathic traits. I love this person although he has done things that were dishonest, abusive, burglary and more. All directly to me. He's my brother. We went through so much as kids and I think it greatly changed him. It made him what he is today. I have compassion for him and I've accepted what happened. I am sad because his entire life has been difficult. I am sad he cannot care about me like I do for him. He's not capable because he has no empathy, of course.

My ex-husband, a diagnosed narcissist...I'm not quite there yet in feeling compassion. I do feel sorry for him. He's not a happy person. He never will be. I accept what he did to me, but I think he did awful things. The deception is nearly unforgivable, but I accept what happened. Otherwise, it would hold me back. And I'm going forward, not backward.

I also don't like how he interacts with our daughter. She doesn't either. She will be going to college soon so it will become much less significant. I do think that's holding me back from having compassion. Or I may not ever get there. He did a lot of damage to me over our 18 years. I am always polite to him although part of that is for self-preservation.

Leomama, I hope it's ok I contributed...I thought it might facilitate discussion, it's an interesting topic. If this thread was meant only for you, let me know and I will delete. Thanks.