Thank you so much for your help and advice. <3

Turns out I wasn't still splitting or feeling numb. It just wasn't the right relationship for me by a long shot. It took me awhile to figure that out, but talking with two different friends about everything cued me in and got me to face the fact that I can end a relationship without it being the "fault" of my BPD.

I really do appreciate what you've shared with me, both of you, and I definitely will keep it in mind when I'm facing numbness again.